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Nitram

Nitram

It is always after the sweetest of the darkest cups of coffee that my mind is all puzzled and running around in the most of beautiful maze. A maze filled with treasures only the gods can give to the next. One that is only created by dreams and imagination.
It is always after such a cup of coffee that I feel alive, in control and in charge of the now, the yet to come and the forevers of my existence.

Let me put you in my head for a second.
It had a red roof that was tiled in the most beautiful ceramic I had ever seen. The insides were so white-no hotel could compete to thee. The floor was glossy; pitch-black marble it felt floating. So black the space you would imagine yourself walking in. So black the night sky with no stars would have been the brightest of light you had ever seen; this was the beginning. This was the start! The was the start of a joyful ride no soul had ever taken. This was an entrance into a den that was filled with laughter, warmth and the purest of candy floss and sweetest of teas.

This was the house that he had always told me of. The one he had always promised to build for someone with a heart like mine and a soul as pure and gentle. The same as the one he saw when he looked deep into my brown big eyes. This was it! This was the cage he was to put me in.

I had to look in the mirror more. Looking into my own eyes. Communicating and breaking even with that pierced heart. I had to challenge tomorrow, see its beauty and convince myself that it was truly all mine. I drank the water from one of the overflowing sink even though it was hot.
I had to let down all the dirt that was found in my bowel,
My feet in salts I had to soak, coarse they were
Hands in aromatic oils as touches were to change now,
A new body I was to caress now,
My body into the purest of sheep milk I had to drown,
The milk of the virgin sheep,
Ears to be closed off, muted, silenced;
Chants ran through the house,
Chants manifested my heart and uplifted I got,
While in silk I was draped.

“You are worthy! Greatness is now! You are beautiful…”

That became my song, my mantra, my prayer. That was all I covered myself in. It was the lotion that buttered my skin and stroked my now soft skin. The script I learned to play; to understand and to meditate on.

thatoxbw

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